Time to celebrate!

I know I've been quiet for a while, but I've been really, really busy.
I've had me an interview to prepare for and boy did I prepare!

Long story short.................... I applied for a job last year & was unable to attend the interview as I was out of the country. They refused to re-schedule the interview (really nice people!).
My Director of Service was livid & pulled a few strings for me to spend some time on the area - which I did & had a terrible time.
The job was re advertised in January and I applied, the job was then advertised again (to attract a broader base of applicants is the official line - to avoid me having a fighting chance is the non-official line).
I had an interview last week.
They offered me the job on Tuesday.



Say hello to Mrs M - the new Deputy Modern Matron for assessment & treatment services. Hours of work Monday to Friday 8.30-4.30. No more weekends, No more shift work, No more bank holidays, No more working Christmas or New Year.

I'm so excited - I have a secretary allocated to manage (amongst other things) my diary, which is electronic (wow, I'm used to wiping bums!!)

I get to be best buddies with Trixi Lee - rather than having to work with her & be buddies (which is hard on both sides sometimes as I can be a stroppy cow - i know!).

Oh and the best bit - with 7 years less experience than Cruella, I'm now 4 management levels above her - Sweet, sweet Karma!

Oh and a salary raise into the bargain!!

let the celebrations begin & the Mojito's flow!!

Would the real Mrs M Please Stand up? Part 10

It's been way too long, but if you want to catch up Link back to this.

So there was I, living with my parents. In my old room. Bliss!

I never missed a day at work throughout, it was my sanity saver. The one thing I was good at and besides, my best friends were there - why would I chose not to go?

Mr H gathered momentum as the good boy jilted. Even my parents bought into his pity party. I was the one painted as the bad guy. I was the one who had left him, who thought I was above my station. I was the one who must have been messing around. It was obviously all my fault.

I didn't say a thing - to anyone. I took the blame, I listened to the rumours, I put up with my parents siding with Mr H. put up with 'our' friends turning into 'his' friends. Why? Because I was free from him.
My heart broke when his family cut me off completely though, yet I still couldn't bring myself to tell them why I'd left. He was their son, brother, grandson, nephew, they didn't have to know about the bad things - who was I to tell them? Even when his father ridiculed me and openly accused me of having an affair with another woman (his drunken logic being that I couldn't possibly have chosen another man over his son), I still didn't tell anyone anything. His Mum (L)refusing all contact from me cut like a knife - I love L so much - and still I kept shtum!

From the July until the November I continued to live in the same small village as Mr H. I tolerated my parents inviting him for lunch, or out for drinks (they felt sorry for him and blamed me). I never saw him nor spoke to him. I just went to work then came home to the comfort of my bedroom.

At work I continued to go from strength to strength. I really blossomed into a confident young lady (I was only 24!). I saw Mr M every day at work and our friendship grew. He was having problems with Cruella - I listened, but never once did I share my opinion, not once did I hint that he deserved better. He was married - end of story, out of bounds!
I'd been asked out for several dates, but after a disaster with a prison officer (another tale for another day) I decided I quite liked being single!

Towards the end of November I began to feel stifled, my parents were beginning to question my motives for leaving Mr H - was it just a case of me thinking I was better than I actually was, had I tried to be a good wife, was I having an affair? (I think the fact that I'd been out socially once since leaving Mr H would have answered the last question). I started looking for somewhere to live and within days had fallen in love with a little two up two down. Nothing to look at - but it felt right.

I put an offer in on the house on 1st December. Mr H moved his 3rd Girlfriend into my old house on the 2nd. I still paid his mortgage. He still threatened to slit my throat if I stopped.

You can write your name in it

Lola is discovering the wonder of words. She's loving that she can write her name, copy words and even write words that we spell out to her (obviously these talents are from me!).

So, picture a four year old, walking around with a filofax (Mr M's old one that he never used) taking 'notes' at every opportunity. She's way too cute and very smart!

Smart to the point that she's worked out that you don't need a pencil and paper to write.........


.......as I was doing the house work the other morning she begged me not to 'duster' the television.
Why?
'Because the dust is good for writing your name Mummy'!


I really must clean up more. Or employ a housekeeper. Or buy more paper!

Adjusting.........

...............to being weekend parents?

Like a Disney film - 7pm every other Friday brings a magical transformation. The fairy dust settles and four become six. We spend the weekend running here, there and everywhere - and love it!
6pm on Sunday and the magic starts to fade. Mr M takes the boys back to Cruella (rushing so that the car doesn't turn into a pumpkin on his way home).

By 7pm every other Sunday six become four and we carry on regardless.


Whilst it's not easy going from full time, to half time, to no time, to very other weekend time - the boys seem pretty happy with the arrangement. This weekend they have been really relaxed and even stayed until this evening (it's school holidays). Mr M and I think that they have realised that we just want to spend some time with them. SIMPLE. No games, no gimmicks. They get no pressures from us and I think that is exactly what they need.


On the flip side - Lola is not dealing with this very well at all. She is so naughty whilst the boys are here, the minute they are in the car on the way to Cruella's she's fine. She just doesn't get it yet. I suppose it's a struggle for her, she spend so much time as the 'eldest child' then has to drop back into line when Charlie takes up this role - it must be confusing?

Mr M has found it hard too. We hardly know the boys anymore however, this weekend they have really started to open up again - I'm hopeful!


Oh and Cruella is on a diet - I correctly predicted that she is focused on squeezing her fat backside into a tiny wedding dress - a green one at that! Some girls have no taste!

I know I'm rotten - but Karma . . . .

So, whilst we were celebrating our Christmas and the boys were happily shopping with their grandparents this is what Cruella was up to:-

Randal

Whisks Cruella

To Dublin for a romantic weekend

Where he pops the question to Cruella

Who instantly starts planning how she is going to fit this:-

Into one of these..

She's rudely interrupted by one of these.....

and is well pissed off when its Mr M on the line..... (how were we to know?!)

Her weekend goes from this

to this!

She should have turned her bloody phone off - is what I say!!

Wonder if she'll ask me to be her official wedding day photographer? *insert evil laugh*

Put a sock in it .....

....oh, you already did!


'Christmas' morning Lola runs into our bedroom and very excitedly asks if Father Christmas has been again. With this Dora bursts in (jumps her way in really) and asks if Father Christmas has been again.

Both girls jump into bed and all three of us 'push' Mr M out of bed so he can go and check - no point us all getting cold until we've confirmed that there are in fact presents to be opened 9and Mr M can turn the thermostat up on his way downstairs - logic, right?

So Mr M gets (is pushed) out of bed and with his back to us -safe in the knowledge that we are all preoccupied with speculating about father Christmas - he removes his lovely little boxer shorts with the intention of putting on his pants (yes, he's a pants man - he likes it all tucked in and not dangling).

Gotcha!

We girls sit giggling at Mr M's bum and he obliges with a little wiggle before pulling his pants up and turning round to face us.

Lola, in absolute stitches, to the point where she can only just get her words out, points at Mr M and declares:-

"Silly daddy - you've left your socks in your pants "

Mr M turned crimson, I almost pee'd myself and Lola was beside herself that Daddy was silly enough to out his socks in his pants in the first place!

Mr M now gets dressed in our bathroom!

Now the question is which type of socks? I would have said trainer socks - but I'm sure Mr M would insist they were boot socks!!

Service resumes - but it's far from normal....

We had Christmas eve, Christmas day and Boxing day - it was amazing and wonderful and happy and sad all at the same time.
The boys arrived on our 'Boxing day', opened their gifts and then announced that they'd had a good day 'shopping' with their grandparents the day before WTF???? They blew us and our Christmas out for a day at the shops with their grandparents - to say I was angry would be an understatement - I was furious and rightly or wrongly told them both exactly what I thought. Cruella had gone away for the weekend with Randall and had made plans for the boys to go to her parents (another post in itself!)

Lead balloon.............

I then told them that if it were up to me then there would be no way on this earth that they would be coming on holiday with us the next day.

2 lead balloons.........

We got through 'boxing day' and we did go on holiday they next morning - all 6 of us.

We had 4 days away and in all honesty it was far from enjoyable. Our family dynamics have changed so drastically - it was hard for all of us. The boys were so far removed from the boys that we all knew and loved - they were selfish, rude and arrogant. Mr M really had his eyes opened.

We arrived home and the first question from Charlie was 'When are you taking us back to mums?' Mr M and I had briefly discussed this scenario and we took them back that morning. We came home and licked our wounds.

Four weeks passed before we heard from them again, despite numerous calls, texts and emails. Surprisingly *insert sarcasm* when Mr M left a voice mail asking if they wanted to come to London with us they called us straight back - I never saw that one coming!

We all went to London and despite things being a bit strange on the train we had a lovely time. The boys started to ask a few questions about Mr M and why he had had to go to Afghanistan, they also got to hear a little about what he had faced whilst he had been over there - you could see the penny dropping - literally.

We arrived home and Mr M & I had decided that we had to sort the situation out properly - I don't think my liver could have taken much more!

So the long and short of it................

• Cruella has done a really good job of making the boys hate Mr M for going away - they thought he'd had a choice in it all and had chosen to 'abandon' them
• The boys enjoy the freedom that they have at Cruella's and don't want to go back to having 'rules' at our house
• Charlie has hit his teenage years full force and is moody as hell.
• Woody can't understand why things can't just be the way they were?
• Cruella did not allow the boys to come whilst Mr M was away because legally I'm nothing to do with the boys (cheers kids!)
• Cruella has told the boys that we no longer have 50-50 care and that's her decision and nothing is going to change that (place your bets...)
• Cruella does not give a flying F*** about what the boys want.

So we asked the boys what they wanted, we told them to forget about what Cruella wants and not to worry about what they think we might want and here it is:

• To not have to stay at ours on a school night - they don't like to hour each way commute and it makes it difficult for homework etc
• Not to have so many rules at our house
• To come and stay with us every other weekend from Friday to Monday
• To spend half of the school holidays with us
• To spend alternate Christmas and Birthdays with us
• To spend the girls' birthdays with us
• To spend Fathers day with us

What we agreed:-

• The house rules stay - no negotiation - how hard is it to make your bed, take your clothes to the laundry and shower every day?
• No school runs - I'm happy with this as it was four hours every day (3 days a week) that we were sat in the car doing school runs. Also this would have had to have changed when Lola starts school in September anyway.
• Every other weekend here - Hopefully minus the school runs this will mean we get to spend some quality time with them both?
• Alternate Christmas's with us
• Alternate birthdays with us
• Fathers day with us
• Half the school holidays with us.

Cruella has other ideas! She went absolutely crazy at the boys when they told her what they wanted and she was straight on the phone to Mr M - who may I add has really grown a pair since he's been away and firmly told her where to get off!

So the plan is for the boys to come after school this Friday - I wait with baited breath.

My prediction for Cruella involves a letter, child support and a demand for mega bucks! Unfortunately, I'm not often wrong with my Cruella predictions!