Tuesday, 10 March 2009

What, no couch?

Today was my first appointment and I was gutted there was no couch!

The session was a bit bizarre to say the least and I'm not really sure how I feel about it all. I talked about loads of stuff :- my job, the kids, Mr M. All pretty mundane things really. These are things that I don't need help with. Or so I thought!

So after today's session I realise that I actually hate my job to the point that it is making me ill, I resent my step-sons for the quality time that they prevent me from spending with Lola and Dora and I find Mr M to be very selfish and not supportive. F*ck - I've got problems!

I didn't make any reference to being Mrs H and to be honest I after the revelation that my life as it is now sucks, I don't know if being Mrs H really is the problem.

Perhaps the water will be a little less murky after a few more sessions? I go back next week .


Blueydmuse said...

Good for you for going to see a counselor. Isn't it interesting the things that come out? It's good that you were able to identify those things. Some of this may have basis in your past, so don't discount that. If you figured this much out in one session, sounds like you found a good counselor.

Crys said...

From my experience, it takes a couple of sessions to really start making sense of things. Then again, I've never been much or a talker and I hated how I always had to talk about my childhood to make sense of what was going on now. Maybe something you can do now is look at these things that you found actually are bothering you and try to see if there is anything you can do about changing it, and if not maybe trying to change your perspective of it. One of the quotes that I have written down in my journal, that I always keep in mind is "If you can't change your fate, change your attitude." - Amy Tan. It's helped me a lot when I am faced with things that make me so angry. It's not always a permanent fix, but it's helped me a lot. (Sorry for the mini-novel response! It's because I have much love to share!)

Mrs M said...

Blueyd - I have found an absolute treasure. She asked one question and I talked almost non-stop for 60 minutes! It was at the end of the session that we did a 'sum up' and it was obvious that in my head, my life is a mess, I'm not sure it's much better in reality!

Mrs M said...

Crys - please keep sharing honey. I really apppreciate your comments and support.

Anonymous said...

Hell sister, you're just saying what we've all/are dealing with/dealt with...i've discoverd that often times when i try to "solve" one problem i end up digging up 10 more...which is probably why i'm to chicken shit to talk to a counselor and the same reason i probably should :)

dearjenn said...

I'd be a little ripped off that there is no couch either!

I wish you the best of luck. I have held off going for fear that I too will open Pandora's box.

Smirking Cat said...

I don't think you discovered that your life sucks. I think you discovered that adjusting to a stepmom situation takes a lot of heart and guts. And honesty!

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